The Myspace Files, Part 2
Buttigieg to lead Project Distraction
During a news conference at Biden’s University of Pennsylvania office, a hot mic picked up the president talking with NBC’s Andrea Mitchell: “Buttigieg is the best person to lead Project Distraction, Andrea.”
“Joe, he can barely get to his office and knows nothing about transportation. Does he even drive?”
“Exactly. If people find out that all we’re shooting at are a bunch of balloons that a ‘friend’ bought from Party City, we’ll just blame it on Pete. He’s untouchable.”
NBC inadvertently mentions Buttigieg Project Distraction
“First of all, Brian, I’m not sure why you’re on my show?”
“Because I’m NBC’s military expert, Chuck.”
“But you retired…”
“Let’s get to the point, Chuck. Biden’s war is doing wonders for the fortunes of Eisenhower’s military-industrial complex. Ukraine, China, Ohio. War with all those countries, it’s just breathtaking. And now he has the perfect cover with Buttigieg’s Project Distraction. People need to be distracted, and who better to do it than someone with access to land, sea, and air assets and infrastructure? More importantly, everyone knows he’s incompetent.”
“Biden is?”
“Chuck, Buttigieg makes Biden look like a 20-year-old genius.”
“Brian, that was remarkably well said.”
“Thanks, Fauchi adjusted my meds.”
Off the Record: Wall Street vs. Buttigieg Project Distraction
“I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it again. Biden is taking everything he learned from Cheney’s War Baby War and using it to lead us into the glorious future. It may have taken him a while, but he’s found his George W. Bush in Buttigieg.”
“Keep buying stock in everything that even hints of military equipment.”
“Didn’t you tell Brian that earlier this year?”
“Yes Andrea, and now I’m telling you and Alan.
“David, on behalf of my royal family, we’re thankful you continue to helm Goldman Sachs.”
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