The Myspace Files, Part 1
Biden and Zelenskyy Launch World War III
“Listen, AOL, I need to ensure that Zelenskyy keeps my ‘dealings’ with his government top secret.”
“My name is AOC, Joe And why are you making air quotes? Anywho, please don’t use Hunter’s consulting firm in Ukraine as a front for money transfers from Yellen.”
“Damn it, of course not! ABC! That only works so many times. We’re sending him a bunch of tanks and airplanes this time.”
“Joe, won’t that start a direct war with Russia?”
“We’re long overdue for a major war! How else am I supposed to keep Eisenhower’s military industrial complex profitable?!”
AOC on NBC
“AOC, the rumor is that you’re supporting the US sending tanks to Ukraine?”
“The bigger question is why you’re trying to sound like Barbara Walters, Andrea?”
“Don’t deflect on my show,” Chuck Todd retorted. “I’m NBC’s military expert.”
“I thought Admiral Brian Williams is the expert…”
“You’re just deflecting again!”
Off the Record: Wall Street vs. Biden and Zelenskyy
“…that’s why I need you to find me an IRA investment that’s equal to FTX.”
“Brian, with Biden and Zelenskyy continuing to support American weapon manufacturers, just buy any stock that even hints of military equipment production. Better yet, look at Cheney’s War Baby War. They’ve done another exemplary pivot.”
“David, on behalf of my royal family, we’re thankful that you continue to helm Goldman Sachs.”
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