Rahm Emanuel, the incoming U.S. Transportation Secretary was allegedly overheard saying to an aide “…and we’re going to [expletive] ban all Boeing 777s at Kennedy Airport…no airplane is going to [expletive] defame the memory of [expletive] JFK on my watch…”
Emanuel was reportedly talking about the recent departure stall of a Southern Air 777 from New York to Seoul.
Rahm Emanuel
Eyewitnesses on the ground reported to CNN and Fox News aviation experts that they heard all three RB5150 engines spool up thrust and that they visually identified that the plane’s flaps were still set at 90 degrees for takeoff before the stall incident occurred.
The news aviation experts confirmed, upon their examination of the aircraft’s black box data recorders, that the three propellers were not rotating at their maximum rated speed of 150,000 RPM.
“In all likelihood, the NTSB will rule that the stall was due to carburetor icing disrupting the flow of air into the cylinders arrayed around each of the N2 turbine cores. Motor suffocation and stalling is a serious issue and we’re just happy that the pilots followed the proper procedures of putting all engines into beta and inflating each of the stator’s leading-edge boots to barf out the ice from the engines before the aircraft plunged another 10 to 15 feet.”
Upon hearing about the expert commentary, Emanuel allegedly pointed at another incoming cabinet member and yelled “…I want you to [expletive] demand that Pelosi and McConnell begin an inquisition into the operation of American aircraft by the [expletive] Chinese!”
Off the Record: Boeing 777
After Emanuel’s comments were leaked to the media, David Solomon, CEO of Goldman Sachs was allegedly overheard saying “I’ll talk to Rahm. We use Atlas Air’s (owner of Southern Air) fancy executive 747 all the time to shuttle between New York and Bejing. I can’t have him creating any issues at Atlas or in Bejing.”
In other news, the Southern Air 777 continued onto Seoul without further issues.
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